Bias Confirmed. Life Sucks.

I remember the days when I used to complain about everything. You name it and I could tell you what was wrong with it. The upside to things didn't really process much in my mind because they were so clouded by the downside.

Now, I never complain. I love everything and everyone. I can't even begin to start a complaint because my heart has been completely transformed. I see the good in everything and realize everything is for the "good of his grace". I rejoice constantly.

And I would be completely lying to you if all of the above were true. Although I was challenged by my Pastor yesterday to change my life, it will take some time and a sore tongue for quite a while. He challenged me (well the entire congregation) to bite my tongue every time I even begin to complain. Try to talk while biting your tongue...you can't do it. After you bite your tongue think of something new to say that does not include complaining.

"Do everything without grumbling or arguing"-Philippians 2:14

There is a confirmation bias that supports a lot of complaining. You go into something and already had your mind made up about it before and therefore your bias has been confirmed. You are now free to grumble at it for as long as you deem necessary.

You are like a child (or many young adults) that has been blessed to the "n"th degree by your parents and yet "life still sucks". Can you imagine how that makes your parents feel? Take it even further, how do you think God feels?

Your spouse leaves socks on the floor everyday and everyday you tell he/she to pick them up. You can't stand that he/she can't make it to the laundry basket. He/she has had enough and now you are on the road to divorce.

Do you see the trend in complaining? I am as guilty as they come, but yesterday I decided I want to be different. I want to rejoice and be thankful for all that I have. I want to know that His grace is involved in all that comes my way, good or bad.

If there was ever a bandwagon to jump on this would be it! Who's in?

It's Wierd and Totally Radical and I Love It!

So it is official. I have caught the Dave Ramsey fever. This guy is amazing. I first heard about Dave Ramsey and his money saving common sense almost 2 years ago. At that point I was ignorant. I thought, "people don't live without debt, that is unheard of." So of course I did not re-visit it. Well about 6 months ago I ran across a conversation with a co-worker about Dave. She told me about how her and her husband had been debt free for 5 years now and it was all thanks to Dave. She swears by his Financial Peace University. At this point I was curious.

Long story short, I got the FPU kit about a month later and immediately started reading his books. Now the first of the year has come and gone, I am 4 months from getting married and DYING to be debt free. I am so glad to have a future husband that is on board and wants to be just as WIERD as me! We have committed to this. We have no plans of buying a house until we are completely debt free. Even at that point we want to be able to pay as much cash for it as possible if not all of it! I know...WIERD! We will never finance another vehicle. I know..WIERD! We will pay for everything we can with cash. WIERD!

So I am really excited about this, but here is the cold hard truth...it is painful to think about. Not the debt free part, but the getting there part. Sacrifices must be made. We must sacrifice time and stuff to do this. Dave says the only way to get out of debt as fast as you can is to generate as much income as you can until there is no more debt. Well, guess what that means? I get to get a second job! Yep, starting next week I get to work 20 hours a week at Quizno's. This is definitely what I went to grad school for...to get a job in my field of study and then get another job to generate more income (Sarcasm). Oh and I am also super excited about selling anything and everything that is not a necessity. But really, I am not that upset about all of it. I created the debt and now I have to work hard to get rid of it. We are also limiting our lifestyle as much as possible all while paying for a wedding...ugh. We can do this. I am thinking at least 3 years to get there, but we can do this. I have faith. I will do anything at this point to be released from being a slave to the lender.

With all of this said I am pumped about not owing anyone money. I cannot wait until the day that the only payments I have are rent and utilities. An even better day will be just utilities. It will be a long road, but I am willing to stay the course. I know that this discipline and these sacrifices now will serve us and our family the best in the future. We have caught the fever. We want to live like no one else now so we can live like no one else later!

P.S. I got the email today saying that I was chosen to volunteer at the Dave Ramsey event next month in OKC! I can't wait!

So...are you ready to start living wierd or have you been already?

A Letter to Wedding Planning

Dear Wedding Planning,

First off...you terrify me. I am a girl and most any other girl would be great at this, but me? Me? I am not THAT girl! I can't visualize the tables with the mason jars and daisies. I can't imagine raffia tied around the tops or even tie them for that matter. I can't imagine how the food will be placed. I do not have a clue how to even begin decorating that gazebo. Will it be pretty or a poor attempt at creativity? I don't know how I should wear my hair or how I want my makeup done.

I do not know if my guests will want to dance to the play list I will create. I don't know if they will like our food selection. Will there be enough food? I do not know if pictures will take so long that they will get bored and I don't know how many will actually stay for our exit. Heck, I don't even know how many will come.

Here is what I do know. This process...this crazy wedding planning process...it's a mess. It is fun, yet emotional. It is draining, yet thrilling. It is honestly quite the daunting task. However, my favorite part of everything we have done so far has not even been for the wedding at all! It has been the marriage prep part. I have loved every minute we have spent with our pastor talking about life and love. I have loved the tears I have cried over our differences. I have loved the laughs we have had about meshing two completely different and sinful people into one. I have loved the talks we have had about who will do what chores and how we will get out of debt as quick as possible. I have cherished our conversations about being one unified God fearing family that is focused on serving the Lord first and foremost. Oh and the times we have spent with other Christ centered couples...unbeatable. All of this to prepare for the marriage of a lifetime.

So wedding planning, I hate to say it, but you are nothing compared to marriage planning. Forget the details of the reception and whether to order favors or not. Forget the fears of no one showing up. Forget all of the worries and nightmares I have already begun to have 4 months in advance. Come to think of it, I haven't had a single nightmare of my marriage falling apart. Goes to show what I am most excited about and that is doing life everyday for as long as God allows with the man He hand picked for me. Wedding planning you just don't hold a candle to that.

Love,

Sasha

You are my Paul

I just finished watching the end of the movie Julie & Julia. I have yet to see the beginning of this movie, but I love it. I am such a Julie.

My Julia consists of multiple women in one, but the one I like the most is Pioneer Woman. This Ree Drummond, she is something special. She cooks obsessively. She photographs beautifully. She writes thoughtfully. She home schools wisely. This woman puts the home in homemaker. You get the idea.

I find myself putting her frequently on a pedestal. Lately, when I have a new recipe to try, Zeb already knows the originator. Ree puts humor in her recipes as well. She is full of opinions and witty comments. I am such a Julie.

I want to be an artist of something. Like Julie striving to be the artist of Julia's recipes, I want to be the artist of writing or reading or nonprofits or country music or ministry or being a homemaker or SOMETHING! I want my artistry that sets me apart.

That is my goal of 2011. Oh what a year to look forward to. It would be cool to meet Pioneer Woman too!

What are you an artist of?

Birthdays are Awesome!

It has been almost 2 years since I first met this girl...Meet Kali! Today is her birthday and so I thought I would do a little blog just for her. Kali was an RA for me in my final year of Res Life and I am so happy she was brought into my life.

Kali was there the day I got baptized, just barely a month after meeting me. She was there when I went through a rough summer. She was there when I met Zeb. She was there when I struggled both personally and professionally. She was there when I overcame all the struggle. She was there when I passed comps, while I job searched and when I graduated. She is still there today.

I watched her marry her best friend last May and it was beautiful. Since then Kali has, probably unknowingly, set an excellent example of what it takes to be a wife. She remains humble and constantly seeks God in her life. She has lead me and other women in a Monday morning girls group to talk about life, love, and the meaning of all of it. She challenges me to be a better person and listens when I just need someone to listen. She is never judging or criticizing. I love her for that. She just takes people for who they are. Kali really is just a beautiful person inside and out. I feel blessed to call her my friend.

Thank you Kali for being my friend and sister in Christ! Happy Birthday! Looking forward to celebrating tonight!

And to the rest of you...Enjoy life today, go for the extra scoop of ice cream!

S.E.X.

Slavery

Exploiting

XXX

Today, January 11th, is National Human Trafficking Awareness day.

1. The United States is 2nd behind only Germany in human trafficking and 1st in child sex trafficking.

2. The Super Bowl is one of the biggest human trafficking events in the United States.

3. Oklahoma is in the top 10 for states with the most trafficking

4. Runaways and throwaways are most at risk in America to be exploited in the growing sex slave industry.

5. It is estimated that 14,500 to 17,500 people, primarily women and children, are trafficked to the U.S. annually.

That is a very small number of truths for a very large problem. These are our women and children that are being exploited.

It has been almost 2 years since I was introduced to this problem that I thought only existed oversees. I was so ignorant to the problem that sits in our backyard. It broke my heart.

Since that day I have done very little with the information I was given. There has been a small voice though that has never stopped whispering. My heart stirs for the victims of this horrible crime.

Take a moment today. Thank God for the things he is doing in this country to stop the violence. Pray for those still trapped. Pray for the men abusing. Pray for an end.

It all starts with an awareness day like today.

Nella Cordelia: A Birth Story

Nella Cordelia: A Birth Story

My heart overflowed when I read this story. As I got deeper into it I felt the lump in my throat grow bigger. I was trying so hard not to cry. I was trying so hard not to be in that room with all of those people when this small child was being born. I could not help but feel every emotion this woman was experiencing. I can't say I wouldn't feel the same way she did in that moment. Please read this story. You won't regret it.

Happy Monday! It is snowing here. Take it in and love your day.

Sick and Tired of being Sick and Tired!

I missed basically an entire work week due to being ill. It gave me an appreciation for two things. I gained an appreciation for accrued sick hours and a good job, but I also gained an appreciation for my health. This is probably the sickest I have been in a long time and it makes me not want to be sick again for a long while. You see I am not a very good sick person and I think after this week Zeb would definitely agree with that. I whine A L O T! I do not enjoy having the chills, coughing up all that junk in my throat, and I certainly do not enjoy my head feeling like it is going to explode!

This week made me realize that those 8 hours at work are much better than being cooped up in a 500 sq ft apartment all day. I wanted so bad to be better just so I could get out. I have never been one for watching much TV and movies I can only handle in small spurts, so I guess it is just hard for me to sit here on this bony futon waiting to get better. Sleeping was unsuccessful even at night in my bed thanks to the body aches and head aches. I tried wedding stuff, but not even that could hold me over for very long. Needless to say I am thankful to know that I am reaching the end of this mess. I am not looking forward to the next go around and will do anything in my right mind to avoid it. I want to be sick free!

It's Messy

A little over a month ago I started a project that has now been unfinished. I set out to blog about country music; 1 song per day. Easy enough right? Well then what happened? I had a weekend where I had to do some catching up and then I never came back after the 23rd. Unfortunately life happened. Between the holidays and traveling and family, well I just got busy and my blog project became less important. Now, with the new year upon us, the famous question is, what are your resolutions? I suppose I could have some, but then they would probably look like my blog project and then I would focus on how I failed rather than grew.

As I was thinking about this the other day and kinda beating myself up for not completing my project that I promised myself and my readers that I would, something else came to mind. It is very similar to anything in life. Many will have set resolutions to read the bible everyday, workout 4 times a week, write a letter to their significant other once a week, whatever yours may be, but then life happens. Events get in the way. A day passes and we forgot to read Genesis and we think we are doomed for the rest of the year. Or how about this...we promise to love our friends, family, and spouse everyday and then a hard day comes. No matter how good our intentions were about not treating our loved one bad regardless of personal situations, we do and now their is mending to do.

My point to all of this is no matter what it is that you strive to do it is never easy. It is even harder when you are trying to do it everyday. Then there comes a day when you feel defeated and you have two choices; you can keep going or you can give up right there. I believe we were made for more. I believe we were made to keep going. When the going gets tough and it seems like there is nothing left...keep going. When your relationship is dancing in the fire and you can't seem to agree on anything, keep trying. When you have lost your job and nothing seems to be working out right, keep searching. When you committed to a project on your silly blog and didn't complete it, keep writing.

I hope you will keep reading.

Happy New Year!