Well today I was going to share my 25 before 25 list with all of you, but then I read this. My heart was moved.

She is dead on about perspective. She writes about her perspective being changed by losing her jewelry and another woman selling her jewelry to get money for her husband's cancer. My perspective was changed when I read that she is selling things to get money for cancer and I try to sell things to get money just to live with a little more stuff. Thanks for putting things in perspective God.

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will also be."-Matthew 6:19-21

That is not the reason my topic changed today. I am in complete support of what she is asking people to do and I wanted to share it with you. I want to encourage you to write the dream center. I am writing my letter this weekend. Will you join me?

Visit her page here to find out more about it.

One Word

Another thing I found as I was reading new blogs the other day was the One Word challenge. I wished I had found this back on January 1st when I was making new goals for the year. I am not sure what my word would have been, but I wanted to make a word starting now for what the year has been and what my word would be through the end of 2011. The idea is rather than making resolutions or goals for the year, just pick a word.

CHANGE.

That is my 2011 word. These are the things I have changed or still want to change for 2011.

Marital status
home base
job
attitude toward Christ
attitude toward others
relationship with the last two mentioned
body image
career goals
the person to become
fears
time spent
the way I love
money habits
listening skills
the way I learn

2011 has been full of many changes already, but there are still things to change. It is half way through the year and the perfect time to recharge and dominate what is left to accomplish.

As you can see with the amount of changes I have made in my life and on this blog in the last week this word is perfect for my 2011 One Word.

Stay tuned for my 25 before 25 list!

What's your One Word 2011?

Let Me Love You

I was rummaging through blogs yesterday and I read this.

"you can't take care of something you don't love. How do you feel about your body?"

It was one sentence that stopped me in my tracks. Even though I am not a prisoner to an eating disorder like this sweet girl...I knew exactly how she felt and exactly why her counselor was asking her this question. She needed to verbalize the thoughts that shot through her mind every time she looked in the mirror.

"your pants are getting tighter"
"you're lazy"
"you will lose him if you let it get out of control"
"you're legs are huge"
"can't you see the cottage cheese"
"you're face is getting rounder"

I don't know if those are her thoughts, but these are just a small glimpse of the sentences that haunt me lately. Every time I look in the mirror I am miserable. I hate putting clothes on these days because I know they won't fit right and I refuse/can't afford to buy new ones. It is a daunting cycle.

Three weeks ago I decided I was making a change and I did. My eating has been completely re-shaped, but the activity has not increased. It is my next step. The reason I bring this up today though is because of that one statement I read yesterday.

"You can't take care of something you don't love."

Steps of progress are slowed by hurdles of disgust.  

I am crying out today because I no longer want to be stung by these awful thoughts. I want love myself when I look in the mirror.

Jesus I want to be so close to you that your thoughts become mine and therefore my beauty shines to me the way it shines to you. Help me love me.

"you are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you"-Song of Solomon 4:7 

The Glass is Half Full

Today I am tired.

Yesterday exhausted me and made me that much more excited for next week. I am tired because I have to get up by 5:30 at the latest in order to shower, take care of the dogs, get ready for the day, make lunches and coffee, and get out the door by 6:30. Yesterday it was closer to 6:50 by the time I made it to the car, forgot my cell phone, made it to the car again, and realized I forgot my ring. Ugh! Then I made the hour and a half drive to Stillwater just to be 20 minutes late to work. Yesterday was busy, busy because it is the first week of classes at OSU and there are lots of overwhelmed freshmen that need their advisor. Then it was rush out at 5pm to get back on the road in order to get to Tulsa as quick as I can to start the first night of my part time job. And it is not Sonic. By the time I finished up my training there I arrived home at about 9:30...beat.

Today I am tired and I am doing it all over again.

Tonight I will have day 2 of my training for the new part time job. I know. I know. Things change in my life as fast as night changes to day, but this time I am sticking to it. After I thought I was going to work at Sonic, I stumbled upon a hostess job at a local restaurant called Lucky's. It is a locally owned upscale restaurant down on Cherry street in Tulsa. Cherry street is this cute little half mile stretch of restaurants, shops, and nightlife. Since I love restaurants, the hours were great, and the money is way better I decided to take the leap. They hired me immediately. I was ecstatic! My first night of training was a bit overwhelming and I am praying I catch on quick!

Today I am tired, but next week will get better.

Next week I won't have to wake up as early to get everything done. In fact, next week I can wake up at about 6:15 to start a morning run at 6:30 and still get back to shower and be at work by 8:30. FANTASTIC! Then I will only have a 20 minute drive to and from work. I will work the part time job on Mondays, Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays and still have plenty of time for my husband and friends. God is so good!

Today I am tired, but I have got lots to look forward to and I am thankful for that.

Is your glass half full or half empty today?

Just an Update

This week I am in Stillwater Tuesday through Friday. In order to save on gas, we decided it would be better if I could find a friend to stay with for the middle of the week and then go back home on Friday. Well yesterday morning, I guess you could say I wasn't so much prepared for that. As I have gotten older I have come to really enjoy my routines. For the last almost three months my routine has been to sleep next to my husband every night. Therefore, yesterday morning there were small tears as he left for work. I hugged him so tight and he laughed at me. I just...I just like my routine and I was sad that it would be different for a few nights. I made it through though and I know that Friday will be here before I know it.

In the meantime I am getting some great and much needed girl time. My sweet friend Liz came over to hang out with me last night and we got to do some major catching up. I missed her. I will also get to spend some time with my friend Shelby over the next two nights. She is letting me stay with her and I am so grateful for that. This week I have felt extremely grateful.

Other good news is I got a second job. I will be working at Sonic part time. This is such a blessing and I am glad to have my Sonic experience because it made it very easy to get. Thanks Daddy!

Happy Hump Day friends! I hope you are finding the blessings in everything around you this week!

Our New Home

Saturday was the big move! Thank goodness we had Zeb's Dad to bring a big trailer or it would have been a whole lot more expensive and time consuming! We only had a few bumps along the way. Overall it was successful and I wanted to share some pictures!

This is obviously a side view of the kitchen. It goes straight through to the pantry and laundry room.  

This is my counter that displays my pretty rooster canisters. I love them :)

Our food pantry. I love having this extra space!

Looking from the Kitchen. Our table and the back patio. Shadow and Ryder like to watch outside.

Our nice fireplace. Zeb was quick to hang stuff so our home actually looks like a home! Love him!

One view of the living room. What is that?? Oh ya...cable...what a cool concept!! ;)

The other view of the living room. Zeb was super pumped that we decided to come out of the dark ages and get cable!!

The guest sink.

Our new shower curtain. I love it and it is manly enough for Zeb!

Our boring bedroom. We have no wall decs for it yet.

The other side of the bedroom.

Our sink.

A view of the kitchen from the living. Yup we have a wall mirror. I love the bar lookout.

And the pups enjoying the new place!

All in all I am very happy with our new place! Other than the spiders I have found it is comfortable and plenty big enough for the 4 of us! I have adjusted a whole lot better than I thought I would and Tulsa, well we might have just been made for each other!

Happy Monday!

A Leap of Faith

Yesterday I got a call from the United Way of Tulsa. They were calling to offer me the position that I had recently interviewed for. Today I accepted and on August 29th I will start my new role as a Loaned Executive. I will get into the details of that in a minute, but first I thought I would let you know what led us down this path.

Zeb had been searching for an internship to complete his final hours of his Aviation degree. He was offered an internship position in Tulsa at Omni Air International. This is a private chartering company that will allow him to learn about their operations department. They are also a debt free company which I just think is AWESOME! He starts on Monday.

We had went back and forth on whether to move all the way to Tulsa, halfway to Tulsa, or stay in Stillwater. When we made the decision to move to Tulsa we were then faced with the dilemma of what I would do. I could either commute an hour and a half one way twice a day for the next 5 months or I could job search in Tulsa. Since we knew he would be done in December and beginning his own job search it was hard for me to know whether to find a full time professional position or just something to get us through. Then God popped in and reminded me He was still there with a plan in mind if I was willing to listen.

That is how I was led to the United Way position. It is perfect because it is a temporary position that provides monetarily and professionally like a full time job. It runs August 29th thru November 18th. I will be assigned to 100 or so companies and help them complete a successful United Way campaign. I will provide fundraising ideas, do presentations for their employees, or just provide materials for them to complete their fundraiser.

I am beyond excited about this opportunity for a few reasons. First, I get to assist in reaching the goal of raising $24.5 million dollars in 2 months. WOAH! That just sounds crazy! But, these are dollars that will put resources into a jobless person's hands to help them become employed again. They are dollars that will provide a safe place for a woman and her children to go when experiencing abuse. They are dollars that will allow food and blankets to be purchased and distributed to the family that has been misplaced due to a catastrophe. These dollars will provide 61 Tulsa agencies with the money they need in order to continue to help the less fortunate in our community. These dollars make me happy to raise and the agencies have a special place in my heart. God created me to do work like this.

I am also excited because of the amount of networking I will get to do. This is a great opportunity to meet many different people at all different levels of the organizations in Tulsa. This could be a great asset when starting my next job search in just a few short months. Finally, I am excited because it is completely different than what I thought I would be doing and it makes me wonder what is up God's sleeve next. It makes me wonder what great plan He has for me and where He will take me. It also makes me cling even more to Him because the unknown is scary and I can't get there without His hand in mine.

Zeb and I are certainly taking a leap of faith and trusting that our perfect and loving provider will continue to provide for us, but in the mean time prayers are welcomed.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight"-Proverbs 3:5-6

My Coffee Shop

Yesterday I was feeling feisty. Today I am feeling much better. Thank you Starbucks.

Everyone should have a special place that does a number on your emotions and makes you all warm and fuzzy. That is exactly what Starbucks does for me. I don't get to experience it as much these days due to budget cuts so I tend to get really excited on the days that I do. Today was the 2nd day all summer that I have gotten to spend time in my special place. It brings a sense of nostalgia with a hint of creativity. I like to reminisce my early days of Starbucks.

I used to go to the Starbucks by Mesa Community College or the one in Fashion Square Mall everyday in between classes my Freshmen year. If I went to MCC it was because I was waiting on my best friend, Amy, so we could have lunch.

Once I moved to Flagstaff it became a popular place for my friend, Summer and I, to visit. We could spend hours and in fact sometimes made multiple trips in one day during Pumpkin Spice Latte season.

Since being in Stillwater, it has been a place of multiple friend get togethers and late homework nights. More recently it has been a place to do early morning reading.

It is a place of comfort and I enjoy that. Today, I am thankful for that little coffee shop, that in reality is not that little. I am thankful for the place it has given me to enjoy coffee, build friendships, and complete books.

Choices

Warning: This post is a tad soap boxy

This morning I began my new running routine in order to train for the 10K I plan to run in October.

It. was. rough.

I decided to rotate walking and running every quarter of a mile. That is how weak my body was this morning. It got me thinking about how two years ago I could run 4 to 6 miles with no problems and how sad it was that I was struggling with just a mile today. I got through about 2.5 miles which was right on for my training.

As I was showering after my run I started thinking about the choices we make. In my opinion, almost everything that Americans desire the most require a conscious choice, but seem to be the hardest choices to maintain. The examples that come to my mind are the desires to be wealthy, healthy, happy, and maybe have a relationship with Christ. These things don't happen by chance, they take an effort, and a choice. They require self-control.

For instance:

acquiring wealth will require choosing not to live in the moment and in debt, but rather choosing to sell what you can't afford, waiting to purchase until you have the cash and not the credit, and saving rather than spending. Choose to be responsible for your own money management rather than expecting someone else to bail you out.

being healthy will require choosing to buy fruits and veggies rather than chips and other snacks, choosing not to over indulge, choosing to cut back on drinking and smoking, choosing to exercise, and choosing to care about about more than just an appearance. Being healthy is not just about what you look like, it is about creating a lifestyle that will allow you to climb the stairs and live to see your grandchildren. It is about having control over your life rather than letting your life control you. And since I am on this soap box I will just mention that buying fruits and veggies are not more expensive than the processed stuff and I despise that excuse. You may not be able to buy both, but then again the point is to eat more of the better stuff anyway. Just yesterday I bought bananas for the week, 4 apples, enough carrots for the week, a cucumber, and a bag of oranges all for under $10. These are great substitutes for fiber one bars, 90 calorie snacks, and other lunch accompaniments for the same price if not cheaper. The catch...they may require a little more prep time. That is not much too much to sacrifice.

being happy, well that is just a choice. Life is full of constant ups and downs. Unfortunately, our tendencies can lean more to the crappy rather than the happy. I have been a victim of this for years, but more recently I have found that I want to get away from this. It takes way more energy out of me to actually be grumpy than it does to be happy, but for some reason the grumpy is easier to stir up. In the last year especially, I have consciously spent less time with the people in my life that have a tendency to be grumpy. I find the people that choose to be happy to be much more enjoyable to be around and are very encouraging. Everyday I remind myself that I can choose to be happy too.

Finally, having a relationship with Christ. This is something that is personal to me, but I know there are many others that struggle with it too. This is another thing that you have to choose to do. Just like with any relationship you have to make time for it. You have to choose to read your bible, choose to have quiet time in prayer, choose to praise and worship, and choose to humble yourself. This world makes it real difficult to build a relationship with Christ. There are constant distractions and sinful natures. No one is perfect and sometimes it is just downright easier to take the well traveled path rather than the narrow path of Jesus. At the end of the day though, I would argue that the choice to keep trying to build that relationship is way better than the alternative.

I guess what I am getting at through all this jumble is that the things that are really worth it in this life are the hardest to come by. They aren't things you will just stumble into and they certainly won't just place themselves in your life. They take a choice to be different. They take an effort that this country is forgetting. When you live in a world that is me, me, me, and consume, consume, consume it is easy to forget that wealth, health, and happiness are great investments of time and above all else you need a Savior to carry you through it all.

"For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith, goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ"-2 Peter 1:5-8
   

A Life of My Own

I never thought I would love a place as much as I love Stillwater. This small town has stolen my heart and is far from giving it back. Aside from being without a Target, well, it is pretty much perfect to my standards.

It started with this color and this mascot. I was hooked the moment I entered campus. I was mesmerized by the amount of orange that flowed from everything.

These buildings became my home my first year. These buildings provided me with a community. The Kerr-Drummond towers were mine and I loved it.

Then I found a home here. Lifechurch.tv. I met some great people, adults and kids. Got baptized, became a volunteer, and basically had my life re-shaped.

"The Strip" is the local nightlife in this small town. I have enjoyed my fair share of this little street, especially one special joint...The Cricket.

I coached an awesome group of little cheerleaders and brought alive my child like side.

And made some super great friends!

Oh! And I fell in love! With a super hot country boy if I might add! :)

And in between all of that I did graduate and actually hold a few jobs. More than anything though, I created a life in this small town. People always ask me why Oklahoma and small town Oklahoma even, but I am slowing learning that Stillwater is far from a small town. Try the one stop sign town. Now that is a small town.

But the reality is I have come to realize I am a small town girl. No one could ever explain it, not even me. I wasn't raised in it, I hadn't had a lot of experience in it, but I dreamed of it and I loved it.

Zeb and I recently visited some friends in small town Texas. Now I think that is the only other place I could love more than this one...it has a Target. :) And there are those big Texas stars everywhere and they actually have annual rodeos. I mean this place is where it is at.

I am not ready for change. I am not ready for change at all and I guess recognizing all the things I love and will miss about this place is the only way to really come to terms with it. Small town America is where my heart will forever lie, whether it is Stillwater or not.

I will face you big city for a short while, but it is only a matter of time before I find a way back to my heart happy home.
I dream of something like this...

in a place like this...

With a few of these...

And these...

And of course these...

Maybe throw in some cows and chickens...and a vegetable garden and pretty much complete madness. But I am excited for that complete madness because it will be mine, God-given, but mine. I get happy just writing about it and thinking about it and dreaming about it.